Stylesheet For Today

 Word count 324                                                 

Community – Add after any group

Wrong – Brown haired

Wrong – Scientists

Right – Brown haired community

Right – Scientific community

Commas – separate items in a list, but not clauses

Clauses – There are none – college educated people don’t understand them.

Conjunctions – Use at the beginning of a sentence

Wrong – He was at home, but he went to town.

Right – He was at home.  But he went to town.

Impact – Use wherever educated people would use affect or effect.  Use everywhere.

Wrong – The injury had effects that affected him.

Right – Impact impact impact impact impact.

Reported or alleged – Never use.  Use reportedly or allegedly, adverbs that might apply to something, but probably not.

Wrong – He was reported to have stolen a safe.

Right – He reportedly stole a safe.

Hopefully – Always use without specifying who is hoping.  Never use hoped.

Wrong – He hoped she would win.

Right – Hopefully she would win.

Issue – Use in place of problem, error, mistake.  Those words should never be used.

Wrong – He died of cancer.

Right – He died from a health issue.

Clichés – Use one until it has been used ten million times, for ten years or until it becomes popular again.

Wrong – I have decided that I am interested in Jen.

Wrong – Bad appearance

Right – I walked back Jen not being on my radar.

Right – Bad optics

Grammar rules or spelling don’t apply anywhere unless you want certain jobs, so write as though you were texting in any other situation.

Wrong birthday card – Happy birthday on your 80th Grandmother

Right birthday card – Grammar, happy bday ur 80, lol

Nouns and verbs – Change nouns to verbs and verbs to nouns

Wrong – He spends his weekdays requesting donations from businesses, and he hopes that they will send him big donations.

Right – He weekdays sending big asks to the business community.  And hopefully they will gift him big donations.

A shorter version appeared in Short Humour. It appears in Writer’s egg.


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